1. Never loan money to someone who announces to you that they are "a good Christian." You'll probably never see it again.

2. Never allow a good Christian to give you something and "we can work it out later." You might find you have lost your home and three of your children.

3. Never give a church or minister what you have not got! No use of credit cards to help the church and no taking out of personal loans for the group or local minister, no matter how much you are told "the church" will pay your right back. They won't and make you feel badly for ever asking to be paid back.

4. Never will your property and resources to your church, unless you have absolutely no one else on the planet to share it with. It is not worth it and it is impossible to undue. Many Churches want members to include the church and make some promise to share with surviving children etc. Don't do it! People change churches, circumstances and affiliations change over a lifetime and you will have hell to pay in trying to straighten it all out and your survivors never will. Churches I know have left the children of members swinging in the wind with no seeming conscience about the the whole thing.

5. Never give what you have not got. One more time. Never give what you have not got.

6. Never offer to pay for things for the minister, his home or his family that you cannot afford. A man that would allow you to do such a thing should be avoided as a pastor anyway. If the church can't pay him an adequate salary, don't offer to make up the differences. It never ends and encourages the minister to not do his part when he could.

7. Be sure that any offer to give freely or at a discount to the church or pastor is YOUR idea first and you have not been goaded, guilted or suggested into it. "Yes I can help," or "No, I can't afford it," go a long way in keeping you out of these weeds.

Of course there are many fine ministers out there who would not behave this way. But those are not the ones that are going to leave you and your family crying behind closed doors.